"It's amazing how someone can break your heart but you still love them with all the little pieces"
Now, I thought that was weird... That this quote I stayed up late at night reflecting on repeated itself elsewhere in my life. So yeah it's a cowinkydink that it appeared again but it made me really face the meaning. So I started to reflect... like really reflect and started to realize how this quote was the definition of the person I was months ago. How broken I was months ago but still loved him with every piece of that broken heart. How I forgave and forgot and how I still longed to be with him. Even though he ripped my heart, piece by piece, into this broken mess.
This brought me down in the dumps again.. but only for a second... but it did. Here I am single, Happy (for the most part) and free. But why do I still feel this void or emptiness when it comes to HIM. Someone who was a big part of my life for 7 years but who hurt me beyond explanation the last couple of years. I did love him with every piece of that broken heart. I felt like I swept it all into a pile and tried to hang on to that love. Why is it that I still miss him and want to be with him even after all this time? It's been a 2 year challenge to overcome this heartache and I'm in a good place in my life, but how come upon reading this quote all these emotions flow back in just like that. Who am I now... I'm Strong, I'm Happy, I'm Free! But this really scared me because in two minutes I went from who I am now to who I was a year ago. It made me realize that even though I'm where I am today.. I have a long way to go until I'm where I NEED to be. But thinking about this past makes me even stronger. I'm not bitter or regretful of this past because all in all it's helping me shape myself to be the person I want to be. So sometimes it's okay to reflect on that past. So long as it doesn't keep me down for too long.. and of course it didn't! Back to my guitar playing.. but until next time. Chao!
